Not Quite Betty Crocker

Having already stricken lies and the word “but” from my arsenal, I am further constraining my verbal options by removing the following phrase: “I wish.”

Why?  Because I realized the other day that all of my frustrations with my husband start with that phrase.  “I wish he wasn’t so ___” or “I wish he’d ____” or “I wish he wouldn’t ____.”  Interestingly, though he and my bff share many of the same traits, on her I don’t EVER wish otherwise. On him, I OFTEN wish otherwise.  On her, it’s part of her charm.

Why is that?  It’s like I want my husband to be perfect and anything short of perfection is an opportunity for improvement.  Ridiculous and unfair.  I pride myself on loving every bit of my friends and family (and removing myself from the situation when I’m not feeling so loving) and on seeing the best in people.  Except for with this man I love more than I’ve ever loved anyone.  I think it’s because I don’t remove myself when I’m not feeling so loving, yet another thing I’m working on.

So, I’m going to work really hard to stop myself when I start thinking, “I wish….”  For the time being, until the habit is replaced, I will instead think, “What a dork!” or something equally benign.  And then I will laugh, even if only in my head.

{Last night Joey and the dogs were chasing each other around the living room having fun and I clamped down on the urge to remind them to be careful.  Both dog and man came running into the bedroom looking both excited and guilty.  “Indy just chased me THROUGH the coffee table and knocked books EVERYWHERE and it was so hilarious!”  Dog nods as Man tells the story.  I laughed.  They had so much fun.  Luckily books aren’t breakable!}